Actual Label Instructions on Consumer Products

1.    On a blanket from Taiwan – NOT TO BE USED AS PROTECTION FROM A TORNADO.

2.    On a helmet mounted mirror used by US cyclists – REMEMBER, OBJECTS IN THE MIRROR ARE ACTUALLY BEHIND YOU.

3.    On a Taiwanese shampoo – USE REPEATEDLY FOR SEVERE DAMAGE.

4.    On the bottle-top of a (UK) flavoured milk drink-  AFTER OPENING, KEEP UPRIGHT.

5.    On a New Zealand insect spray - THIS PRODUCT NOT TESTED ON ANIMALS.

6.    In a US guide to setting up a new computer - TO AVOID CONDENSATION FORMING, ALLOW THE BOXES TO WARM UP TO ROOM TEMPERATURE BEFORE OPENING. (Sensible, but the instruction was INSIDE the box.)

7.    On a Japanese product used to relieve painful haemorrhoids - LIE DOWN ON BED AND INSERT POSCOOL SLOWLY UP TO THE PROJECTED PORTION LIKE A SWORD-GUARD INTO ANAL DUCT. WHILE INSERTING POSCOOL FOR APPROXIMATELY 5 MINUTES, KEEP QUIET.

8.    In some countries, on the bottom of Coke bottles – OPEN OTHER END.

9.    On a packet of Sunmaid raisins -  WHY NOT TRY TOSSING OVER YOUR FAVOURITE BREAKFAST CEREAL?

10.   On a Sears hairdryer - DO NOT USE WHILE SLEEPING.

11.   On a bag of Fritos - YOU COULD BE A WINNER! NO PURCHASE NECESSARY.
       DETAILS INSIDE.

12.   On a bar of Dial soap -  DIRECTIONS – USE LIKE REGULAR SOAP.

13.   On Tesco’s Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom of the box) – DO NOT TURN UPSIDE DOWN.

14.   On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding –  PRODUCT WILL BE HOT AFTER HEATING.

15.   On a Korean kitchen knife – WARNING KEEP OUT OF CHILDREN.

16.   On a string of Chinese-made Christmas lights – FOR INDOOR OR OUTDOOR USE ONLY.

17.   On a Japanese food processor – NOT TO BE USED FOR THE OTHER USE.

18.   On Sainsbury’s peanuts – WARNING – CONTAINS NUTS.

19.   On an American Airlines packet of nuts - INSTRUCTIONS – OPEN PACKET, EAT NUTS.

20.   On a Swedish chainsaw – DO NOT ATTEMPT TO STOP CHAIN WITH YOUR HANDS.

21.   On a child’s superman costume – WEARING OF THIS GARMENT DOES NOT ENABLE YOU TO FLY.

22.   On some frozen dinners – SERVING SUGGESTION DEFROST.

23.   On a hotel provided shower cap in a box- FITS ONE HEAD.

24.   On packaging for a Rowenta iron - DO NOT IRON CLOTHES ON BODY.

25.   On Boot’s “Children’s” cough medicine -   DO NOT DRIVE CAR OR OPERATE MACHINERY.

26.   On Nytol sleep aid - WARNING MAY CAUSE DROWSINESS.

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One Response to “Actual Label Instructions on Consumer Products”

  1. Claudia says:

    OMG, i cant believe these are actual labels!! So funny!
    Companies must think people are rather stupid…

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