Monthly Archive for December, 2005

Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year!

Published in Jokes. 0 Comments

Wishing all site visitors and members a Merry Christmas and a Happy, fulfilling and prosperous New Year to come. May 2006 bring many more laughs with it!

Wish you a Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year

Best regards,
JJ
Site Admin

For help press F1

Published in Cartoons and Drawings. 0 Comments

For Help, press F1!

A desperate cry for help

Size of the Earth vs Other Planets

Published in Photoshop Images. 34 Comments

Ever wondered how big (or small) the Earth really is? Below is a comparison of the planet Earth as stacked up against the other planets in our galaxy..and the sun.

Comparison of the Earth's size with other planets and the sun

Funeral Procession for the dead snowman

Published in Funny photos. 0 Comments

A funeral procession marches solemnly on.. mourning the loss of a beloved snowman!

Funeral procession for the dead snowman

You know you’re getting older when

Published in Lists and Real Life. 0 Comments
  • Everything hurts, and what doesn’t hurt, doesn’t work.
  • The gleam in your eyes is from the sun hitting your bifocals.
  • You feel like the night before, and yo9u haven’t been anywhere.
  • Your little black book contains only names ending in M.D.
  • You get winded playing chess.
  • Your children begin to look middle-aged.
  • You finally reach the top of the ladder,and you find it leaning against
    the wrong wall.
  • You join a health club and don’t go.
  • You begin to outlive enthusiasm
  • You decide to procrastinate but never get around to it.
  • Your mind makes contracts your body can’t meet.
  • A dripping faucet causes uncontrollable bladder urge.
  • You know all the answers, but nobody asks you the questions.
  • You look forward to a dull evening.
  • You walk with your head held high trying to get used to your bifocals.
  • Your favourite part of the newspaper is "Twenty-five Years Ago Today."
  • You turn out the light for economic rather than romantic reasons.
  • You sit in a rocking chair and can’t get it going.
  • Your knees buckle but your belt won’t.
  • You regret all those temptations you resisted.
  • You’re 17 around the neck and 44 around the waist, and 105 around the golf
    course.
  • You stop looking forward to your next birthday.
  • After painting the town red, you have to take a long rest before applying
    a second coat.
  • Dialing long distance wears you out.
  • You are startled the first time someone’s calls you Old-timer.
  • You remember today that yesterday was your wedding anniversary.
  • You just can’t stand people who are intolerant.
  • The best part of your day is over when the alarm clock goes off.
  • You burn the midnight oil after 9:00 p.m.
  • Your back goes out more often than you do.
  • A fortune teller offers to read your face.
  • Your pacemaker makes the garage door go up when you watch a pretty girl
    walk by.
  • The little old gray-haired lady you help across the street is your wife.
  • You get all your exercise being a pallbearer for your friends who
    exercise.
  • You’ve got too much room in the house and not enough room in the medicine
    cabinet.
  • You sink your teeth into a steak and they stay there.

An ear for detail

Published in Work related Jokes. 0 Comments

Merv was in a terrible accident at work. He fell through a floor tile and ripped off both of his ears. Since he was permanently disfigured, he settled with the company for a rather large sum of money and went on his way.

One day, Merv decided to invest his money in a small, but growing telecom business called Plexus Communications. After weeks of negotiations, he bought the company outright. But, after signing on the dotted line, he realized that he knew nothing about running such a business and quickly set out to
hire someone who could do that for him.

The next day he had set up three interviews. The first guy was great. He knew everything he needed to and was very interesting. At the end of the interview, Merv asked him, “Do you notice anything different about me?”

And the gentleman answered, “Why yes, I couldn’t help but notice you have no ears.” Merv got very angry and threw him out.

The second interview was with a woman, and she was even better than the first guy. He asked her the same question, “Do you notice anything different about me?” and she replied: “Well, you have no ears.” Merv again was upset and tossed her out.

The third and last interview was the best of all three. It was with a very young man who was fresh out of college. He was smart. He was handsome. And he seemed to be a better businessman than the first two put together. Merv was anxious, but went ahead and asked the young man the same question: “Do you notice anything different about me?”

And to his surprise, the young man answered: “Yes. You wear contact lenses.”

Merv was shocked, and said, “What an incredibly observant young man. How in the world did you know that?”

The young man fell off his chair laughing hysterically and replied, “Well, it’s pretty hard to wear glasses with no ears!”